Children are supposed to help hold a marriage together. They do this in a number of ways. For instance, they demand so much attention that a husband and wife, concentrating on their children,
fail to notice each other’s faults.
(Richard Armour)

Okay, Mr. Armour poet man, so you’re saying that my kids are a kind of “distraction glue” for my marriage? That without them, my wife and I would have no choice but to separate, because then we’d have to face each other, faults and all?

Well, whatever, man. That cannot possibly be true. My wife and I are soulmates, tied together by nothing but the whole-hearted commitment that united us in the first place. We always put each other first, above the kids, and we look forward to all of our kid-free time together.

So what if we spend most of our week driving the kids to their various after-school activities. So what if our date nights are spent, most efficiently I might add, planning out the next week’s kid schedule. So what if we celebrate our 25th anniversary with less fanfare than our daughter’s Sweet Sixteen. So what if our 25-year-old college grad is still unemployed and living in our basement! We actually like having him around!

Just because our kids occupy most of our time, our conversation, our vacation time, and our money, doesn’t mean they are the glue that holds us together.

Does it?

Peace begins with pause,