Image: Flickr/Jill Watson

“If you have never been hated by your child, you have never been a parent.” (Bette Davis)

Perhaps you haven’t experienced it yet, but as your kids move towards the teen years, the odds of it happening approach 100%. They push against our decisions and rules, and it feels to us like hate. They may even use the word from time to time.

The truth is, regardless of what they say or how they behave, they don’t really want us to give in. In fact, they want to exact opposite. They want to know that we can be trusted to do what is in their best interest. Even more importantly, they want to know that we can do this without losing our cool. They want to believe that we can stand up to the terrible twos, the fearsome fours, the perilous preteens, and even the twisted teen years without taking their immaturity personally and responding in kind.

So, when your toddler thrashes around on the floor, take heart. When your second grader crosses his arms in defiance, stand firm. And, yes, when the alien who has taken up residence in your middle school daughter’s body bores a hole through you with her eyes and storms out of the room, keep the faith. You are one of the few. The proud. The parents.