Stop trying to grow quickly
“Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of not growing.”
The first step towards lasting growth is changing your thinking about growth itself. Making small, gentle changes is usually the best path to long-term progress. “Instant results” or “quick fix” options generally have a backfire effect, landing you right back where you don’t want to be.
If you’ve failed to manage your diet or your exercise plan for a decade, for instance, you can’t expect to clean up your lifestyle and undo the damage in a couple of workouts. The same holds true for your relationships. If you’ve been too needy for other people’s validation for years, let go of the expectation that you are now one of those people who “don’t care what anyone else thinks.”
Instead, take it slowly. Eat one less bite at dinner tonight, or take a 5-minute walk this evening. At some point over the next couple of days, say “no” to an invitation to serve, even if you feel guilty. Or how about this: relax for a brief second when it becomes obvious someone is misunderstanding your point. Don’t excitedly interrupt them and correct, but just sit with the discomfort until they finish their sentence. Then gently offer a correction.
These may be small steps, but inching upwards is growth, nonetheless.
Peace begins with pause,