“Being silly is still allowed, not excluded by adulthood. What’s excluded by adulthood is thoughtlessness, so be thoughtful and silly.”
(Hank Green)

When i’m seated on a plane, and people ask me what I do for a living, I often vary the answer depending on how much I want to talk. If I’m in the mood to sleep, I say I’m a consultant. If I’m up for a long chat, I tell ‘em I’m a sex therapist. 😉

Usually, however, when people ask me what I do, I say this: “I help people learn to pause, so they can respond more, and react less.” This almost always leads to a great conversation about relationships, human interaction, and what it means to be an adult. It also leads, eventually, to a question about why I’ve committed my life to this.

Here’s why: It feels good to be a grownup. And the world needs more grownups.

It’s not easy, by any means. It’s actually quite difficult at times. But few things feel better than standing on your own two feet, taking full accountability for your actions, taking care of business, and doing what you said you would. Few things feel better than finishing what you started, caring for those that need you, boldly representing yourself to your significant other, and calmly confronting an injustice (even though you were scared).

The beauty of adulthood is that we can, at times, choose to be childlike and silly and spontaneous, and at other times choose to be mature, serious, and dedicated.

All of these things are available to us as adults, but not until we are able to pause, respond more, and react less. That’s the key that unlocks all the possibilities of adulthood, and all the good feelings that come with it. (Including truly amazing adult sex…)

Peace begins with pause,