“It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, ‘Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you’ll find one on the end of your arm.'” (Sam Levinson)

I wouldn’t go quite this far when trying to teach my kids self-sufficiency, but I like the spirit of this quote. Too often, I step in when my children are struggling with something because I can’t handle the anxiety. Then I wonder why they don’t do more for themselves – I’m the one who gave them the message that they couldn’t!

But hear me out. Allowing your kids to struggle doesn’t mean that you throw up your hands and remain aloof to their suffering. No, there is a balance – it may look different for each of us, but it should include a healthy dose of encouragement, just the right number of hugs, and probably a little more space than you think they need.