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  • Hooked on a Feeling…

    After meeting their basic needs in a decent way, people don’t really want more…

  • Good Sex is Dying

    A recent study of 26,000 adults reveals that in the 2010s, Americans are having less sex than they did 20 years ago. That’s right. Despite the supposed new sexual freedom…

  • Two Secret Keys to Marriage

    This past weekend I had the honor of teaching a great group of veteran couples our full-day seminar on ScreamFree Marriage. As a custom, I ask around to see who’s been married the longest amount of time. To much applause, an adorable couple announced they had just recently celebrated 55 years.

  • More Conflict, Less Resentment

    Whenever a couple comes into my counseling office and exclaims they haven’t had a fight in 3 years, I always respond the same way: Oh my gosh, what’s wrong?!?! And then I listen for whose internal time-bomb of resentment is ticking the loudest.

  • I Hope Your Teens Aren’t Perfect

    Perfectionism is a disease. Once introduced into a system, it permeates into practically every arena of life: work, school, sport, parenting, romance, diet, exercise, sex…everything. What makes it so dangerous is how it can appear truthful, by infiltrating good virtues like excellence, quality, self-esteem, finishing a task, or “doing your best.”

  • Thinking about Acting On Your Thinking

    “Thinking is easy, acting difficult, and to put one’s thoughts into action, the most difficult thing in the world.” (Goethe) I think taking my wife on a date this weekend would be a good idea. Holidays are over, oldest is back up at college, and the youngest is wanting some time with his buddies, away […]

  • Fearless Romance

    “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” (Master Yoda) There are few things more powerful than fear. Advertisers have always said sex sells, but fear outsells sex, and everything else. It feeds our headlines, stocks our shelves, and shapes our politics. Fear […]

  • Play Ball!

    I love baseball. I love the tradition. I love the history. I love the crack of the bat, the sound of a fastball hitting the catcher’s mitt, the buzz of the crowd. I even love the pace of the game, lending itself to conversation drifting along on the breeze. Baseball is the perfect combination of […]

  • 50 Shades of Intimacy

    So…there’s this movie coming out in a couple of days entitled 50 Shades of Grey. You might of heard of it. It is a movie based upon the New York Times Bestseller which just became the greatest selling novel of all time in Great Britain. What’s it about? Depending upon who you ask, you might […]

  • Podcast #49 — 50 Shades of Sexy

    The novel 50 Shades of Grey took the world by storm. Now, with the movie set to release in a few days, lots of people are wondering what all the fuss is about. In this week’s episode of “You Must Chill”, Hal and John discuss the merits and potential drawbacks of spicing things up in […]