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The Problem with Shame
“You cannot shame or belittle people into changing their behaviors.” (Brene Brown) This is one of those statements that sounds strange at first. Then, it sounds like the deepest and most profound truth imaginable. Then it sounds crazy again. Of course, you can use shame and humiliation to change people and their behavior. We see […]
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Be Choosey
“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.” (Dr. Seuss) Too often, when faced with difficult situations, we think in extremes. We either shut down or blow up. That’s understandable, but it’s inexcusable. We are much more powerful than that, and the […]
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Above All, Be Brief
“When you wish to instruct, be brief; then men’s minds take in quickly what you say, learn its lesson, and retain it faithfully. Every word that is unnecessary only pours over the side of a brimming mind.” (Cicero) There is one cardinal rule for public speaking: leave ’em wanting more. This may frustrate a few […]
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Go East, Young Man!
“The Chinese use two brush strokes to write the word ‘crisis’. One brush stroke stands for the word danger; the other for opportunity.” (John F. Kennedy) Most of us have a relatively easy time spotting danger. We see danger in our marriages, for our children, at our jobs, with our finances. We are well aware […]
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Dreamlike State of Being
“We must teach our children to dream with their eyes open.” (Harry Edwards) Children are necessarily naïve. If they were born with the wisdom of experience, then their imaginations would never develop, and their sense of wonder would never awaken. It’s easy to sometimes get frustrated when our kids lose track of time, or neglect their […]
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Being Brave
“Men acquire a particular quality by constantly acting a particular way. You become brave by performing brave actions.” (Aristotle) We have the tendency to believe that, in order to behave a certain way, we must competent for the task at hand. The reality is facing the task without being certain of the outcome is what […]
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Friends with Kids?
“She discovered with great delight that one does not love one’s children just because they are one’s children but because of the friendship formed while raising them.” (Gabriel Garcia Marquez) There’s a very common parenting axiom thrown around these days. In an effort to reverse the trend towards over-involvement in our kids’ lives, we parents […]
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Do Something Different
“People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer the suffering that is familiar.” (Thich Nhat Hanh) I was talking to a woman the other day who had huge bags under her eyes. She was pale and worn thin from a lack of sleep. Her […]
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Be Rich
“The greatest good you can do for another is not just share your riches, but to reveal to him his own.” (Benjamin Disraeli) When we help others get better at something we’ve mastered, we’re sharing the riches of our wisdom. That kind of teaching should be a vital priority for all leaders, but it shouldn’t […]
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Head Held High
“Never bend your head. Hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye.” (Helen Keller) Life can wear you out. It’s not only physically demanding, it’s emotionally exhausting at times. The daily grind of work and chores and family — it can build to the point that you’re willing to do just about anything […]