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October 5, 2017

Our Biggest Enemy as Parents

“If you don’t get anything else from this book, get this: Our biggest struggle as parents is not with the iPad or smartphone; it’s not with bad influences; it’s not even with drugs or alcohol. Our biggest enemy as parents is our own emotional reactivity.”
(ScreamFree Parenting 10th Anniversary Edition, p28)


Since you’re a subscriber to The Daily Pause, you’re probably familiar with the thought behind the quote above.


We don’t call our company, and our philosophy, ScreamFree because we can’t tolerate loud voices. Truth be told, yelling out loud is just one manifestation of this greatest enemy to all our relationships, emotional reactivity.


Learning to pause, so we can respond instead of react, is the most human of all actions. No other species on earth can choose to pause and consider carefully what to do next. Only humans can do it. Unfortunately none of us do it quite enough, and that’s why we exist. Perhaps we should call our programs and books Human Parenting, or Human Marriage, or The Human Workplace, because that’s what it takes to create and grow the kinds of relationships we all crave.


Peace begins with pause,



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