“Thoughtful” is a term that we commonly misuse. Whenever someone does something kind, we often describe such a gesture as “so thoughtful.”
Such a usage limits the power of the term, however. Instead of just meaning “kind,” we should employ the term to describe our overall approach. I want to be thought-full, for instance, whenever I engage in conversation with my wife, whether that means complimenting her or confronting her. And I definitely want her to do the same.
This is especially true when we disagree, which is fairly often. If such disagreement occurs between two thought-filled people, then that usually means that both sides have a valuable contribution to add.
If we’re always thinking alike, however, that usually means one of us is not being very thoughtful at all.